There was a bit of confusion over what happened yesterday on twitter, but one thing is clear: I ended tax avoidance forever.
That’s right, tax avoidance doesn’t exist any more.
Through a radical legal argument I determined that all tax avoidance is technically cheating. Cheating is a form of fraud. The fraudulent reduction in tax liability is tax evasion.
Ergo, all tax avoidance is, in fact, tax evasion.
The tax avoidance gap is therefore zero.
These are undeniable facts and anybody who says different is a liar. Lying is a form of cheating. Cheating is a form of fraud. As the above relates to the correct payment of tax disagreeing with the above is fraudulent incitement of tax evasion, which is technically tax evasion.
If you see anybody referring to tax avoidance, please refer them to this blog where they will be forced to confront the stark reality of their crimes and beg repentance from The State of Courage.
However, it is too early to celebrate. There is an awful lot of tax evasion still around, about £160bn more than there was this time yesterday. We have not yet achieved Justice for Taxes.
But I think we can all agree that my victory over tax avoidance should be celebrated. Henceforth, I declare that 17 December shall be known as Murphy Richards Day.
My thanks to the other members of the Justice for Taxes Network who have decided to remain nameless.
Once again World: you’re welcome.