The government outsources the taxation of the private sector to… the private sector

The title of this post basically sums up exactly the problem I am outlining and the key issue with economics today: that the private sector does stuff for money, unlike nurses and teachers, so it is bad.

But, I know there are many pedants who read this blog who like to see “facts”. Well, I will provide you with some facts.

It has come to my attention that this Coalition has introduced a regime called “Corporation Tax Self Assessment”. That is a fact.

Under this regime, the government subcontracts to a company the task of ensuring they pay the correct amount of tax. The company is required to sit down with copies of the corporation tax acts, and all relevant case law judgements explaining how those laws are to be interpreted, and work out their tax liability.

So, HMRC expect the company to be able to understand the law, to interpret it correctly and then to calculate the correct amount.

Now, people often think that I am a bit cynical about motives of companies and their employees, but this is just an ad hominem attack on me. I am actually very open minded and empathetic about other people and their selfish intentions.

So, being generous, I can see that not every accountant is a tax expert, and there are certainly none who match my intellect. Invariably they will make mistakes.

However, these mistakes are almost universally in the favour of the company, like claiming research and development tax relief, capital allowances or the base cost of assets for chargeable gain purposes.

All of these are elementary errors, usually the sort made by many junior tax staff, but companies should employ better trained tax accountants who can interpret the law correctly.

Any good tax expert knows that Parliament wants you to behave like you can claim these things as deductions, but they certainly don’t want you to actually claim them.

Suggesting that Parliament wants less money clearly misinterprets the Will of Parliament and is sophistry. So it is tax avoidance, pure and simple, a wilful misinterpretation of the law in order to reduce tax payable.

As if this wasn’t bad enough, the government are introducing an interim GAAR panel which will not have a single member of HMRC on it.

This is simply absurd. We don’t need an impartial panel that is independent of all stakeholders. We need a panel of people who will simply agree with the inspector of taxes who brings the case before them.

Justice for Taxes may not be done otherwise.

Having all private sector members will mean that they simply look at any case and say “it’s completely reasonable to avoid taxes because money is lovely”.

Private sector people have no morals. They love just money. Whereas the people from HMRC are noble and community minded.

Or why not have members of UK Uncut on the panel? They’d be able to tell what’s tax avoidance simply by looking at the turnover of any given business.

It’s just nonsense to suggest that justice should be seen to be independent of government. That’s what’s wrong with the judiciary! So, why on earth replicate that model when we need something different?

We need a panel independent of the private sector if anything. It needs to be populated by union reps and civil servants. Only that way can it be seen to be independent of vested interests.

I’m sick of talking to you idiots about this. Why don’t you get the fact that the judiciary is rubbish precisely because it is independent of government?

If the government controlled the judiciary then they could simply tell businesses how they have misinterpreted legislation. Instead, you have judges pretending that tax law is the same as any other law.

It’s different because it’s written by The State for the benefit of The State. And so The State should be allowed to correct people when they’re wrong. That’s justice.

Starbucks, you think you’re allowed a deduction because it’s legal? Come on, pull the other one. The State wants your money and is only paying lip service to OECD rules.

When Parliament enacted those rules they didn’t mean it. Don’t be stupid.

What’s “fair” is what The State says you should pay. So dispense with your psychotic tax advisers and anarchistic lawyers. You have no right whatsoever to disagree with The State. Give us the money you bastards.

It’s The State’s money anyway. We should just freeze your bank accounts on the grounds that you are economic terrorists.

What have you got to say about that, pedants? Is that a load of “authoritarian hogwash”?

No, it isn’t. That’s ethics in action.

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